I have a really weird situation with my job right now.
So, let me just start by saying that I have THE dream job. Like… I can’t even begin to describe how insanely out-of-this-world amazing it is that I have my job. This job is THE absolutely perfect fit for me. Except… it’s more of a fit the “me” of 5 years ago.
Early in my career (when I was a young’n) I was absolutely obsessed with programming. I spent every waking hour “hacking” — experimenting, learning, and teaching. I loved speaking at conferences. I loved going to meetup groups. I basically lived on Twitter, talking tech. I loved blogging and recording screencast videos to show off cool coding tips and tricks to other coders. Hell, I even started a few user groups, started a state conference, and built 2 businesses around software.
Now, what’s AMAZING about my predicament is: that’s my job now! 🎉
For real. Everything that I have been passionately obsessed with over my career is actually my day job now. A Dream Come True! Right…?
Problem is: that super obsessed coding workaholic…? She’s kinda dead now.
About 4 years ago, I heard about this crazy new, spiritual idea that I had never heard of before. It is called the Work / Life Balance. The spiritual teachings of this philosophy taught me that I don’t need to pour my whole soul into my career. Crazy, right?
All kidding aside, I really did kill the ‘coder chick’ inside of me. I even deleted my Twitter account. BOOM.
Nowadays, I cherish my personal time. I’ve spent the last 4 years getting to know myself and discovering new hobbies. Plus working on my #adulting skills.
Over the past few years, I…
- Got divorced
- Moved to a new state (all by myself, bitches!)
- Rescued the most adorable dog in the whole wide world
- Started to actually enjoy cooking (and not just mac n’ cheese)
- Focused on finding my personal style, both in fashion and at home
- Quit drinking and smoking
- Started reading (ya know, like those book things? Not just my Facebook feed…)
- #KonMarie’d the bejesus out of my home and life
- Started working out (hahahahahaha this is a total lie)
When I get home after work, I like to walk the dog, deal with the mail, put on the news or music, cook dinner, and prepare for the following day. Then I settle into my relaxing evening routine: change into comfy sleepwear, make a pot of chamomile tea, do my face, and curl up in bed with my tea and a book (with my little #copilot curled up beside me 🐶).
Before: passionate conference-loving, stressed-out hacker / blogger / workaholic.
Now: happy. following my own passions.
It’s so ironic. I have my dream job. But it’s not what I’m passionate about anymore. Wtf?
Am I still passionate? Do I want to speak/blog/screencast/teach again? If not — why not?
The answer is: Yes.
I do love the work that I do. I am insanely passionate about it. I just don’t dedicate time to it after-hours anymore. And, if I’m going to be successful (and I WILL), I need to start incorporating my career goals and passions into my personal time again. Re-adjust my Work/Life Balance a bit. And I will. I guess that’s why I’m writing again.
🎶 Isn’t it ironic? Don’t ya think? 🎶